Definitions of nice on the web:
pleasant or pleasing or agreeable in nature or appearance
decent: socially or conventionally correct; refined or virtuous
Being nice is generally considered to be a virtue. Nice is a very broad and vague word and encompasses everything from being empathetic to helpful to being understanding and comforting and convenient. Right from our childhood we are taught to be “nice” to everyone without ever being told about the precautions that need to be taken. Being nice can forge great relationships, spread megawatt smiles and change the world. However, it can also be an emotional quicksand.
Being overly nice to people can make them take you for granted. They stop seeing the emotion that goes into being nice. Nicety is mostly remembered and appreciated if the recipient is in some trouble. When that same person enters a better phase in life the same nice behaviour is taken for granted. It may also be perceived as unnecessary interference or worry.
Nice people run the risk of being labelled as too soft. The emotional effort that goes into being nice and caring is seldom recognized. People get so used to be treated nicely and well that they fail to appreciate it. Realization only returns when the person hits a low point in life. However, the realization evaporates quickly in happier times.
Sometimes, it makes me wonder if being nice, comforting, accommodating , understanding , etc is really worth the effort. Being nice is not worth it if it makes you feel miserable. Sometimes it amazes me how people return to their fair weather friends and very conveniently forget the people who stood by them in their dark times. Nice people run the risk of being used as “punching bags” by the same people they once comforted as they know the nice person will not react. What they don’t see or conveniently ignore is that behind every nice act , there is an undercurrent of a feeling of care and attachment.
To conclude its nice to be nice but choose very carefully the recipients of your generosity. Being too nice to people who don’t value it enough will make you question your own values and beliefs. Faith in one’s ideals is very important and we must protect it all costs. Be nice but don’t be vulnerable. It’s not worth it if it reduces you to being just a shoulder to cry upon or someone to be missed when there is nothing more interesting to do.
@kins- abhay and you like to gang up against me all the time…what have i done to you guys? [:(]
abhigya why do u always want ur frnds to be totally explicit in a public forum…………
d point is that only u will suffer in dat case 😛
@abhay-dude kaun si baat?
hmmm..to baat itni serious ho gayi hia??